And it starts just where the light exists
It's a feeling that you cannot miss
And it burns a hole
Through everyone that feels it
Well your never gonna find it
If your looking for it
Won't come your way
Well you'll never find it
If your looking for it
Should've done something but I've done it enough
By the way your hands were shaking
Rather waste some time with you...
The words of the psychic still echo in my head. "Do you see anyone coming into my life?" I ask her.
"No one good," was her reply.
No one good. Last night was another trip down the rabbit hole. Two girls came over. It was not planned, more of a spontaneous hook up. It is a repeat of prior encounters. I'll spare you the details, except to say it was worth the lost sleep. The girls find me charming. They peg me for 10 years younger than I am, by the way I look and talk.
"I had a lot of fun with you! You are one of a kind." One of the girls sends me after.
I have meet six girls from the Seek Arrangements site. Two just for drinks. They all fall into the category of “no one good”. Not that they are bad people. Just that they are not what I am looking to meet. The Gymnast came closest and she is the youngest. What does that say about me?
“I would give it a break for a while,” my friend Jay sends me in a text, “or it will mess you up.”
I agree with him.
I miss Billy. I miss what I had with her, but I know there is no going back; not even if she wanted. I don’t think she knows what she wants. Still I cannot close that door
These encounters paints clear a picture of what type of relationship I want. It is the void of substance during the encounters. I want what is missing I have't found a way to find it.
Well your never gonna find it
If your looking for it
Won't come your way
Well you'll never find it
If your looking for it
Should've done something but I've done it enough
By the way your hands were shaking
Rather waste some time with you
Waste some time with you...Blue and Yellow, The Used
the song may be right, it's that thing where if you try to look for something it never comes, it's only when you finally get looked at. like that show "Looking". like atomic theory, where the thing only exists if you look at it through a microscope. like the music video for the Tool song "Vicarious" where you enter that pink Vedic underground lair of a million otherworldly eyes the size of planets all looking at you as you move
ReplyDeleteI get looked at too much. I am still looking for someone. Maybe the perfect wrong person...again.
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