Half Post

I sometimes wonder if my lack of posts is related to my need to explore my thoughts and feelings more deeply. It could be because Grammarly edits everything I write and makes it better than the original. I saw Brit two weeks in a row, but I've ghosted her this week. I am just not feeling it with her. It's strange, too, because she is one of the hottest girls I have had an arrangement with, and she wants to continue. I just don't feel any connection with her. I felt more connected to Ava, and she ghosted me without reason. I don't know what that means.

I am still isolating myself. I have to make an effort to reach out and connect, but the isolation seems like a natural progression of who I have always been. I am getting together for dinner with Jay and his wife this Friday, but last weekend, when Sam didn't call to suggest doing something, I felt a bit relieved.

I am not using this alone time to build anything, though. I have been focused on a game on my phone, getting my steps, and eating. Like the Sixth Sense, we only see what we want to see.

Update

A long time ago, we used to be friends
But I haven't thought of you lately at all
If ever again a greeting I send to you
Short and sweet to the soul, I intend... We Used To Be Friends, The Dandy Warhols

I debated whether to contact Tinkerbell and see how she is doing. I don't reach out to many people very often. Besides my twins, Gia is the only person I text frequently, but I think even that will wane. I am not sure Gia will return to Michigan.

I sent a text and asked Tinkerbell how things were going. She didn't reply, so I don't think I will bother picking up the phone next time she calls. I deserve the same level of respect, and she fails to give it.

Brit came over Wednesday night, but she is hard to talk with and seems to struggle with depression. I wouldn't enjoy spending a weekend getaway with her, but she is hot and does the job, So I don't mind seeing her occasionally.

I have not noticed anyone else interesting. I have been concentrating on walking. I have hit my goal of 6700 steps daily for over two weeks and have averaged over 10,000 steps for the past eight days. I am picking up other exercises, too. It is not doing what I want; I am not losing weight, but it is supposed to be good for me.

Not The Nail

 I don't know why I haven't been taking the time to write more. Many things go by without me recording them here. I find it hard to recreate the events in a narrative that pleases me. This is ironic considering all the tools we have today to improve our writing. 

I have been communicating very little with anyone lately. I told Gia I reached out to her more than anyone else, which surprised her, considering we don't text much. 

Brit sits across from me on the couch. She is talking to me about her relationship with the guy from California. They met on Instagram. Brit flew out to see him. This guy lives with two roommates, both women. One was supposed to be his cousin, but Brit never sees this cousin and isn't sure she even exists. 

The red flags continue to pile up. First, the guy says he is in his low forties. It turns out he is fifty. He has five kids by three women that he never mentioned to her. He is a graffiti artist and likes to tag trains—at fifty?

The conversations she tells me are him gaslighting her. Brit is a psychology major. It is the classic case of a person with mental issues seeking answers. Brit is visibly upset over this guy. I wanted to tell her he sounded like a big loser who would not bring her happiness, but you can't fight emotion with logic. The whole conversation reminds me of the YouTube short  It's Not About The Nail.

I shut down the conversation by leading Brit upstairs. 

Nothing is Perfect

I have been seeing both Gia and Brit. Both could be better. I enjoy hanging out with Gia. She is opening up to me slowly but plans to stay only through June. She is still hard to get close to, which makes intimacy difficult for me. Gia knows it, and I know it. Mostly because I want more from her.

On Sunday, I picked Gia up from her AirBnB. 

Gia: (You can pick me up.) As long as you take me to Walmart, that's the deal. 

Bathwater: No problem.

Gia: And UPS. I need to mail out my rent.

We stopped at both so she could run errands and then head into New Baltimore for lunch. After we ate, we walked through a small fleamarket before returning to my condo. 

*      *      *

Brit came over Tuesday night. She spent the first forty-five minutes telling me about a long-distance boyfriend (sort of) who lives in California. She is upset with him, but not over him. The guy has so many red flags around him that she should be running away from him. Brit seems immature for her age, probably due to some past relationship. Naive and vulnerable are the words I would use to describe her even though she is thirty.

Options

 Gia is back in Detroit, which surprised me. She indicated she was thinking about coming back, but then, on Monday, she texted me, saying she was coming back on Tuesday.

Gia: I'll be in Michigan tomorrow.

Bathwater: What? Tomorrow? Thanks for the heads up.

Gia: Hah

Bathwater: How long do you plan on staying?

Gia: A while.

Bathwater: Well, that narrows it down.

Gia: A month to start.

I said Gia needed to let me take her to dinner on Friday for her birthday. She doesn't like working the weekends anyway, so I told her we could hang out in Royal Oak. I would take her to all the worst places.

Brit still seems to be interested in continuing to get together. We are hanging out on Thursday. With summer approaching, it is nice to have options. 

Keyfob

 Brit came over last night. I'm picky, and even I admit this girl is a 9 out of 10. I still need to figure her out. Brit is quiet, but I don't see any red flags yet. She has blond hair, a pretty face, and a nice natural body. Brit says she wants to gain a few pounds but hasn't felt like eating lately. She looks perfect the way she is now. She should have her choice of options.

On the lighter side, I got in the Gladiator this morning and didn't have my key. You only need to have the key in your pocket to start the vehicle, which is a push-button start. I looked all over the place for my keyfob and started wondering if Brit had walked off with it. Silly, I know, but hey, I don't really know her. Twenty minutes later, I found my key in the kitchen junk drawer. I must have thrown it in there when I was cleaning up.

Brit, Mulch, and Covid

 Gia flew back to Rhode Island Friday morning. She enjoyed her time here. It is as close to a vacation as she will allow herself. I don't think I have seen the last of her. Although it is expensive for her to make the trip. Gia knows a dancer in Texas who is considering joining her next time. It would make the journey more inviting if she split the cost with someone. I'd be curious to meet this friend of hers. Gia only gets close to a few people. 

Remember Brit from this post? Brit came over to the condo Friday night. This girl is really hot. Brit wore light jeans, a top that showed off her stomach, and a white sweater. I showed Brit around the place and then went to New Baltimore to eat. Brit is not a picky eater, which is nice. She's quiet, but I pulled some new information from her.

 Brit has a day job, but her psychology degree is not paying off. She really needs a Master's or better. Brit is thirty. Her parents divorced when she was twenty. Her dad remarried and is not in the picture, but she is close to her mom. Brit has a kitten. Brit says she has had mutually beneficial arrangements in the past, but judging from how she comes across, I suspect it was more like an older guy who cared for her. 

Brit is quiet and seems naive for her age. I have decided to be open-minded about Brit. She is interested in continuing our arrangement and wants to get together again this week. We only did some heavy petting at the end of the night, but she has clarified that she is ready for more. 

I tested positive for COVID-19 on Sunday. Over the weekend, I hauled 115 bags of mulch for the Condo association. We offer 5 bags to any resident who wants to spread it themselves. We are having 200 more bags delivered, but Home Depot has delayed our order. The Association decided to get ahead because the mulch was on sale.

I spread at least 40 bags over the weekend while sick. I hit areas where people had already weeded, or the weeds were easy enough to pull before laying the mulch. It will only partially solve our mulch problem but will make a significant dent cost-efficiently. If the mulch goes on sale again, I am going to push us to do a second round this year.

Coffee

 I met the new girl at a coffee show in Roseville yesterday. For lack of a better name, I will call her Brit. Brit has long, straight blond hair and a fake tan glow. Brit wore yogi pants and a gold halter top that showed off a bit of her midriff. She also wore large gold hoop earrings—the type you don't see many girls wear anymore. She is pretty and better looking in person than in her pictures. She has a nice petite body. I would say she is in her low thirties, older than she claimed, but still fine with me.

Brit looks different from the type of person who usually clicks with me. She seems more like a high-maintenance stripper than the girl next door. Out of my financial league is the term I would use. She told me she has a bachelor's degree in one of those social fields that don't pay well and wants to get her master's degree. Maybe, but from the way she looked on our coffee date, I say there is more to the story.

Brit is quiet, but we managed to have a conversation. I indicated what I was looking for, and she said she was interested in pursuing the arrangement further. I am skeptical, but I wouldn't mind it right now, even if we only get together a few times. She said she was going out of town next week. That could mean anything, from she is seeing someone else to that she is keeping her options open. She did respond positively to my text after we met. Time will tell.