I've started this post a few times. At first it was going to be a recap of my weekend. Friday, Bunny and I went kayaking. Saturday, I went biking with Tinkerbell and her boyfriend. We rode thirty-one miles over the course of the day. Sunday, I did yoga in the park, than got a massage in the afternoon.
Firefly came over Sunday night. She is treading water, but refusing to surrender to the process. I offer what advice I can but if she doesn't make some changes she will end up in jail again. She reminds me very much of Billy.
I have become reclusive. Mostly because of the virus but sometimes I wonder. It is hard to come to terms with the fact that I will probably not have another long term relationship. Much of my life has revolved around a relationship, finding one or searching for one. It is what I learned growing up. The goal to life. You work hard. You get married and you have kids. It turns out, that was the worst mistake I made.
I have no idea what direction to go next. For twenty-five years I collected Legos thinking one day to build great things. Lately they sit unused. My current project is writing the memoir. It seems more of a cautionary tale than anything.