Ava came over and spent the night Thursday. She arrived at 9:30 pm, took a shower, and crawled into bed with me. We started having sex in the bedroom, but I pulled her down to the living room at one point, and we continued on the couch. We spooned together downstairs for a while before returning to the bedroom.
We talked late into the night. Ava would like to get away with me again, though her schedule keeps getting more complicated. I have to keep reminding her of this fact. She has compromised a lot of things for her current relationship. She says the good outweighs the bad. This is probably true, although the more she becomes financially stable and independent, the less she will need what is appealing, and the bad will become more glaring over time.
I wouldn't be able to explain this to her, but I think she sees that instinctively. Currently, she is trying to have the best of both worlds. Being fully committed is hard when you have options, and Ava is not short on options. She talks as if she wouldn't be too phased if she got caught and her relationship ended. I believe that to be true.
At some point, her desire for long-term security will outweigh her desire for thrills and adventure, but I don't see that happening soon.
I am reading a new book, The Ape that Understood the Universe. I am only a third of the way through, but it is very good. One of my first takeaways from the book is natural selection has engineered humans, like every other species on the planet, to procreate the genes we carry. Not the species but the genes. I think modern humans outlive our usefulness in that.
I also believe in the future, if our species survives and continues to advance, we will become more asexual and reproduce through genetically engineered replication. The evolution of humans will become more rapid. It has taken millions of years to get here, but our technology is outpacing evolution.
We are currently out of sink with our biological imperative. We will either outgrow the biological imperative or be thrown back by some cataclysmic event. I am just speculating. I don't think I will be around to see either outcome.
I hope Ava is about to figure out what will make her happy and get there.
ReplyDeleteWell she may through all her cards into her relationship, that would not be good for me. I am hoping she figures out she doesn't need this serious relationship to be happy.
DeleteCool photo below. I think commitment is hard for most people, not just talking about sex.
ReplyDeleteCoffee is on and stay safe
I think there is less need to commit to a long term relationship today.
DeleteThat's a very intriguing thesis. I'm reading a book by Jennifer Graff: Origins, a Genetic History of the Americas which traces the history of the early Americans from Asia.
ReplyDeleteIt is my own persistent theory based on what I see and read.
DeleteI think this is happening already: a significant portion (by significant I mean probably around 15-20%) of my friends who have children have had "some help". By "some help", I mean heterologous fertilization, which means, to me, that the kids do not carry their genes (and trust me, quite often ... it shows). It's something I do not understand, as I would much rather go for adoption than go through a pregnancy for a child whose genes are not yours, but I do not judge - to each, their own choices.
ReplyDeleteYou a less bonded to a child without your genes. That is what the book I am reading says.
DeleteI don't think she will settle down long term with this guy either, but I am not sure how it will play out in the short term. I don't see things changing anytime soon.
ReplyDeleteNatural Selection is an interesting process that Nature takes. Mankind has often screwed with it tho' and thus interfered with the Genius that the Natural World is designed with. People are so arrogant to think they can improve upon what is already perfectly designed by Nature to function as it should.
ReplyDeleteMan tinkers with nature to improve the possibility that mankind's genes will replicate.
Delete