Friday, I raced home for the meeting. I avoided stopping at the bank and the grocery store, so I would have time to prepare, and the customer did not even show up for the meeting. WTF. Still, I wasn't looking forward to the meeting anyway.
One of my coworkers asked what I was doing for Ava for Valentine's Day. It has been on the back of my mind. Ava has taken on a significance in my life. The number of posts mentioning her keeps rising in the tracker on the right side of the blog.
I don't know what would be appropriate given the situation. I don't think a store-bought card would send the right message. When I was young, and the ex-wife and I were dating, I hand made her a card every week. Some of those were quite creative. I made Billie a few cards while we were together. My talent has atrophied, but I decided to create one for Ava. It is thoughtful without gushing with love.
At this point, the concept of love seems contrived. I have been in love, and it has never worked out well for me. Best to avoid it.
At this point, Ava is still a mystery. Her actions and words do not align. The phrase I keep reminding myself is, "never need someone more than they need you." That should be my next tattoo-- added in Latin to the other phrases that make up the sleeve on my left arm. They are a road map of quotes I should remember but seldom do.
Here are a few translated back into English.
What nourishes me destroys me. (this being love)
I suffer, but I shall overcome
Remember to live
Actions, not words (keep this in mind when dealing with people)
I have been talking to a couple of other girls recently. For a while, I planned on forgetting about other women and just concentrating on Ava. Now, I am not too sure. There is no reason to put all my eggs in one basket. Spring is coming, and I want to have someone I count on being around.
I don't think I've ever been a romantic person, but I will take the free chocolate if you're handing any out.
ReplyDeleteI didn't buy any chocolates. Ava is not the type. I bought her favorite protein drinks. some are dark chocolate flavored.
DeleteSo... can you share a pic of the card?
ReplyDeleteI was going to, but in my haste I forgot to take a picture before sealing it in the envelope. Perhaps, Friday when she opens the card I can get a picture.
DeleteA Sleeve of meaningful phrases in Latin, very nice. My Granddaughter is convinced that after she's 18 she's getting at least one full Sleeve, at one point she toyed with whether being a Tattoo Artist could be a good Career Path, now she's thinking Retail instead. She has done Henna Mehndi on herself and others for Years, she's pretty good actually, of coarse I'm totally biased about that. *LOL* In our Family more of the Girls have Tattoos than even the Guys, but most of the Family do have at least some. Except for The Man, even with a lengthy Military Career he avoided the Ink... mostly due to starting out as a Special Forces Sniper... he said he already had a Bounty of over Thirty Grand on his Head during Vietnam in the early 70's, so he wanted no distinguishing identifying marks on himself. Hand Made Cards are the best... go with your Gut about Ava... I would think by now you probably have an instinct about what probably won't be worth investing yourself in fully. Love can be tough, the depth of your hurt is always measured by the depth of the Love you will have for anyone.
ReplyDeleteIt is true, the depth of the hurt is equal to the depth of the love. I don't think I will ever recover from the some hurts.
DeleteI like that you make your own cards. I do that too. I think that means more than anything shop bought.
ReplyDeleteYou are not entirely at ease with Ava so give it time. Follow your gut. Enjoy but don’t become too caught up. Make room for other things too.
That is good advice, Jules.
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