The day before Firefly left for rehab, she sat in bed making phone calls and sending text messages. I sat down next to her. "I have to go into the office tomorrow," I tell her. "Can your mom take you to the airport?"
"My mom and dad are going to take me."
Firefly is feeling down. She is hard on herself. Firefly lost several friends to drugs and doesn't feel she should be the one to have survived. She asks me to stay with her for a few minutes, so I join her under the covers, holding her close. Firefly rolls on top of me, resting her head in the crook of my shoulder. Raising her shirt, I rub her back, tracing the line of her spine and shoulder blades before allowing my finger to roam down to her butt and back.
I raise her face, and we kiss. Things progress. Firefly rolls onto her back, and now I am on top of her. We continue to kiss then quickly remove our clothes. She likes it hard and fast. It is not easy for me to hold back climaxing. Firefly rolls over and gets on her elbows and knees. Her round butt is raised. It is a beautiful sight. I enter her and quicken the pace until I cum.
"This isn't how it is supposed to be," I tell her after. "Being here is not helping you."
"What? I initiated sex," she says. "It isn't that often I'm horny. You should be happy." I think we both had the same thing in mind, but I don't argue.
I get up and go to the bathroom to clean up. "This is supposed to be easy," I continue. "It doesn't feel right." I am not helping her. She is not getting better. Things are not supposed to be one-sided. The next day she leaves.
So far, she does not seem to be in a hurry to return. She likes the facility and seems to be trying from what I can glean from our short conversations. We will see how it unfolds.
Good luck to Firefly and you as well, bathwater.
ReplyDeleteShe seems to be thriving at the rehab. If only she could stay away from her old ways when she returns.
DeleteI agree with you, her being there was not helping.
ReplyDeleteNo, and I was not feeling good about it.
Deletesurvivor's guilt is a very difficultly painful thing to get over, takes a very very long time
ReplyDeleteI think she needs to feel like she is doing something with her life. Give herself a reason to survive.
DeleteDon't beat yourself up about a moment.
ReplyDeleteI am not, I am glad we had that last encounter. She is determined to be way for a long time this time.
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