This post has been in draft for a few days. Work has been busy, and I have been lazy.
I worked in the office Friday afternoon after Ava and I parted. I texted Sam and asked if she wanted to go to dinner. I was making an effort to get out. I haven't been very social lately. Tinkerbell hasn't shown any interest in getting together for whatever reason, and though I have seen a few other friends over the last few weeks, I prefer sitting at home.
The weekend was no different. I went to dinner with Sam, but I couldn't wait to get home. I spent the rest of the weekend watching episodes of House and playing video games. I am not sure if this is a problem. I would deny I am depressed. I have had depressive episodes, and this doesn't feel the same.
Sam invited me to a fundraiser at a hall next weekend. It would be a chance to meet some new people, but it sounds exhausting. I have not been good company lately. Which does point toward depression or maybe just winter.
It has been a while since I heard from Tinkerbell. She is distancing herself from me. She tends to do that with everyone in her life. She doesn't speak to her family. I can't blame her, though. After all, I tend to do the same thing. We are kindred souls.
I have stopped wondering what this year will hold for me. It is what it is. Ava's favorite saying. She'd be proud.
Well, you just had surgery and are healing from that. Plus winter. I think you should cut yourself some slack for now. Your energy will return. I think all of our energies will return at some point. Hopefully soon-ish.
ReplyDeleteThis is the time to rest and relax at home and let yourself fully heal after surgery.
ReplyDeleteI suppose you could be right. Though I am not getting any younger.
DeleteBe kind to yourself, Bathwater.
ReplyDeleteI think I have a harder time being kind to others.e
DeleteI hope it's a good video game! I'm killing vampires in Evil West, a first person shooter. As a game, it's okay, not great. Too much of the combat is arena, big area with lots of enemies. Difficulty level is "story" because I want finish it.
ReplyDeleteBeen meaning to try that one.
DeleteNo mostly solitaire and word games on my phone.
DeleteI been tired.
ReplyDeleteCoffee is on and stay safe
Maybe it is the season. I guess I should move to a warmer climate after all.
DeleteYou're feeling like I've been feeling and I don't particularly want to analyze why I prefer to just stay Home and not Socialize much, if at all, since, I'm just enjoying being a Homebody right now. I see nothing wrong with it and you might be just fine and enjoying time spent apart from peopling. The Son is 36 and is doing the same thing, he and I discussed it recently and he was relieved that I felt he should just not worry about it, enjoying what he's doing or NOT doing is and should be more the focus. He likes video games and is playing against people around the World. He said sometimes the War sounds in the background of other Players is REAL and it makes him so relieved he is living in a Country enjoying Peacetime. He couldn't imagine War raging right outside his Doors every day and having to 'escape' that via Gaming. I agree.
ReplyDeleteYes there is always worse out there and they say the internet is a good way for people to stay connected. Other than the blog, I don't use it as such though.
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