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Our conversation turned to my luck with dating sites. "I am looking for age-appropriate women," I assure her. "But I don't think age-appropriate will practice using the hula-hoop topless in the living room."
"That's not normal," she tells me.
"Yeah, well, Billie did."
"That's not normal," she tells me.
"Yeah, well, Billie did."
* * *
I am in the loft area of the second floor working on my computer. I glance right and see Firefly walking from one bedroom to the other. She is naked and carrying a bundle of clothes on her way to the bathroom in the spare bedroom. She has claimed that space as her own.
While she is showering, I head down to the basement to ride my stationary bike at lunch. Thirty minutes into my ride, she comes downstairs with my Jeep keys in her hand. She is wearing an olive green Victoria's Secret sports bra and cut-off jean shorts.
I pull off my noise-canceling headphones so I can hear her. "I should be back early," she tells me. She gives me a quick kiss and heads back towards the stairs.
"Just keep me posted," I tell her, then add, "and don't disappear."
"I will," she replies without pausing or glancing back.
"I know you will. Every time you leave, you disappear," I joke, then put back on my headphones and continue my workout.
Firefly is not accustomed to structure or discipline. Her parents did not set any boundaries. She came and went as she pleased by the time she was 15 years old, which explains a lot of her current issues. She changes plans spontaneously. She sets goals but often lags at following through with them. Necessity and the desire to get high seem to be her most significant driving forces.
Living with me gives her a safe space to make plans and goals but takes away some of the necessity to achieve them. I take on the role of the adult figure. It is a part I have a lot of experience with from my time with Tinkerbell and Billie. People who find the situation weird usually come from a secure family where they receive positive attention. Firefly did not.
"I feel like I am taking advantage of your situation," I say to her. We are in the Jeep, driving home after getting a couple's massage.
"You're not. It is mutually beneficial," Firefly assures me. The fact that I question it, and my history with Billie and Tinkerbell, tell me she is right.
I am not in love with Firefly. I was with Tinkerbell or Billy. I hope Firefly gets her car and goes to a long-term rehab like she is planning. She often puts the cart before the horse. She looks for cars and rehabs when she should be looking for dates to make money.
Sienna, my cat, is the only one not happy with the situation. She does okay when the girls come and go. Sienna is not pleased when they stay for days. She does alright when Firefly is sitting in one place, but she does not like it when Firefly is walking around. Sienna will hiss and chase her when I am not around. We are working on that.
Firefly is not accustomed to structure or discipline. Her parents did not set any boundaries. She came and went as she pleased by the time she was 15 years old, which explains a lot of her current issues. She changes plans spontaneously. She sets goals but often lags at following through with them. Necessity and the desire to get high seem to be her most significant driving forces.
Living with me gives her a safe space to make plans and goals but takes away some of the necessity to achieve them. I take on the role of the adult figure. It is a part I have a lot of experience with from my time with Tinkerbell and Billie. People who find the situation weird usually come from a secure family where they receive positive attention. Firefly did not.
"I feel like I am taking advantage of your situation," I say to her. We are in the Jeep, driving home after getting a couple's massage.
"You're not. It is mutually beneficial," Firefly assures me. The fact that I question it, and my history with Billie and Tinkerbell, tell me she is right.
I am not in love with Firefly. I was with Tinkerbell or Billy. I hope Firefly gets her car and goes to a long-term rehab like she is planning. She often puts the cart before the horse. She looks for cars and rehabs when she should be looking for dates to make money.
Sienna, my cat, is the only one not happy with the situation. She does okay when the girls come and go. Sienna is not pleased when they stay for days. She does alright when Firefly is sitting in one place, but she does not like it when Firefly is walking around. Sienna will hiss and chase her when I am not around. We are working on that.
I'm friends with the monster that's under my bed
Get along with the voices inside of my head
You're trying to save me, stop holding your breath
And you think I'm crazy, you think I'm crazy
Well, that's nothing... Monster, Eminem
Cats can be very intuitive.
ReplyDeleteYeah, but in this case I think she just being a bit territorial. Sienna is getting better.
Deletethe most important thing in a relationship, the greatest indicator, is the cat situation, I know this from experience firsthand. we had to give our cats flea collars the other day, the medicine wasn't working. I was sad for them but at least it wasn't the cone of shame
ReplyDeleteI think the cat will be here long after Firefly moves on.
DeleteEveryone is focusing on the cat but let's face it - I would pay a few bucks to see Sienna chasing a naked Firefly. Nothing against Firefly, I'm just used to cats that are a bit shy and that would never chase anything bigger than a mouse :-)
ReplyDeleteHow are you doing Bath?
Sienna is getting better. She is hissing less and allowing Firefly to pet her more. I am going okay. I feel like the past and present are overlapping a bit.
Delete