I stayed home for Thanksgiving. I made meatloaf and mashed potatoes and ate two pieces of store-bought creme pie. During my four-day vacation, I took apart the large tower, rebuilt it, and condensed my display. I am happy with the results and have a good idea of what will come next.
Friday morning, Ava reached out to me. We made plans to meet at J Baldwins for dinner at 8:00. I made reservations. Later that afternoon, Ava texted me wanting to change plans. Though she wanted to stop at J Baldwins to pick up gift cards (they were having a sale), she wanted to know if I just wanted to order carryout instead. She claimed she trying to be respectful of my time, but I felt she was gaslighting me.
Ava had ulterior motives. My only guess is that she was worried about being seen in public with me. I couldn't get ahold of her before dinner, but she showed up at precisely 8:00, and the rest of the evening was fine. While we were at dinner, she mentioned the friend she had a falling out with had texted her boyfriend and warned him that she was still hanging out with me. Apparently, this happened a few weeks ago. Her timing was fuzzy.
She told him Jay was lying and said she made it through the conversation. I find it hard to believe that he is that dense. With all the other things that don't add up, it should have opened his eyes. Regardless, something is going on with Ava. As Liz mentioned in her comment, "cracks are forming." What that means is anyone's guess. It is too much work trying to figure it out.
I suggested Ava consider surrendering to her relationship, but she admitted she could not stop doing what she does. That is one thing I believe. "Then, eventually, you will get caught," I told her.
All the lying has got to be exhausting. I find it exhausting, and it doesn't impact me. My comments to Ava are my way of saying either embrace who you are or change. Standing on the fence is the worst place to be. There is no wrong choice except to not make one.
Ava spent the night, and we had a good time. We always seem to have a good time. We watched a few episodes of Wednesday before heading upstairs. I tossed her around the bedroom for an hour before we fell asleep, and in the morning, we did it again, a bit more subdued. Notably, Ava did not make plans to meet up again before leaving. Instead, she said she would be in touch.
A coworker asked if Ava was keeping me from finding someone else. I don't think so. I do that myself. right now, my excuse is my upcoming surgery. But, next year, it could be the case. Honestly, I am not motivated to find someone new.
If someone doesn't want to know something, they won't. Ava's boyfriend doesn't want to know she's not exclusive to him, so he will take her explanations at face value. Later, he will realize that he should have known. That all the signs were there. But he has chosen not to see. He won't see until he is ready to.
ReplyDeleteYes, you are probably right. Even if she changes to save the relationship. I think her past ways will resurface. It isn't a solid foundation for a relationship.
DeleteI'll be in touch? Intersting. Meatloaf is great! Meatloaf sandwiches are even greater! With ketchup, and a slice or two of cheese.
ReplyDeleteYes, I was fine with it.
DeleteMeatloaf is called Polpettone in Italia - it's like saying big meatballs :-) my family recipe calls for mixed meat (beef and pork), egg, breadcrumbs, milk and parsley and then we roll it up in pancetta (like bacon) and bake it with sliced potatoes. Although it's been years since we last made it - as the majority of the family tends towards vegetarianism. But I agree with Dave, meatloaf sandwiches are slurp!
ReplyDeleteOf course Ava's not keeping you from finding someone else. But I don't really believe in searching for someone - these things just happen. Of course, how much you go out vs how much time you spend home alone has an impact, but as you said, that's up to you and not to Ava.
And I think it makes sense not to make big plans until the shoulder surgery
Meanwhile you take care, ok?
I am doing okay. I don't think you find someone without putting yourself out there. Of course the quality, I tend to find seems to be the problem. It comes down to looking in the wrong places I suppose.
DeleteI love meatloaf. Now that the weather is cooler I'll be making some soon. I don't use the oven when it's 118 out. My air conditioner can't keep it cool enough in here to do that when it's that hot.
ReplyDeleteI'm really surprised her boyfriend doesn't have a clue.
I think Ava did get caught. She just doesn't want to tell me. That is why she has been acting extra peculiar.
DeleteYes, she is young for thirty. I think there is a lack of ability to focus.
ReplyDelete