I went to dinner with my brothers on Sunday. It has been about two years since I have seen my brothers. We don't talk much, or I should say, I don't speak to them much. We were never very close. My older brother is two years older than me. The other is three years younger.
I first noticed that I am the healthiest and look the youngest. My younger brother walked in with this ragged ZZ top beard. He was totally gray. He has had heart issues. He looked like a homeless man. Definitely underdressed for the restaurant my older brother picked. My older brother has several health issues. He has lost a couple of toes to diabetes and has a colostomy bag. Is this what being married for forty years does to you?
We talked together for two hours over a meal. They both ordered pasta while I had a sausage dish. My older brother spoke about working until he turned sixty-seven. He was advised he should plan to live to eighty-eight from his financial advisor. If I had already lost toes to diabetes, I would not have ordered two cannolis to go like he did. I don't see him being very healthy by age eighty-eight.
They say married men live longer than single men. I wonder if that is true if you take suicide out of the equation. More men kill themselves than women. I feel like I would be more like them if I was still married.
Depends on the marriage, I suppose. I imagine some married men are happy. Not all, of course. And divorce was right for you. Too bad you and your brothers are not close.
ReplyDeleteDivorce as certainly right for me, although I never asked for it.
DeleteDNA probably has a lot more to do with the colostomy bag than marriage, unless you're implying your brother got the shits of his wife. Statistically women tended to live longer than men, but that's changing as more women enter the work force. Also, an interesting stat: single people account for 30% of all households in the US, a good percentage of them are women.
ReplyDeleteI think marriage can lead to people becoming stagnant and not taking care of themselves.
DeleteI am often amazed at how people don't always take care of themselves which leads to illness. And then they still don't take care of themselves!
ReplyDeleteThey rationalize their choices. Sometimes food is all they have to look forward to.
Deletewow meeting the family really gives you depressing vibes Bath! It's very strange for me, as I've always been very close to my brother despite the fact we live very different lives.
ReplyDeleteI think women tend to hold the family together more than men. Then again, as I get older, I don't remain close with fewer and fewer people.
DeleteYour post reads very familiar. Family Dynamics are always interesting
ReplyDeletePeople like to say blood is thicker than water, but I don't believe in that.
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