I have been having stomach issues for about three weeks now. They crept up on me suddenly. I suppose I was ignoring earlier signs. I tend to ignore symptoms. At fifty-five, everything hurts sometimes or other. I wound up in the ER a few times and at a specialist's office. The specialist was an ass. After several tests, they found nothing significant. Just some moderate irritation of the stomach and small intestine.
I find it hard to believe moderate irritation has sent me to the ER and keeping up every night in pain. The tests do not offer any alternatives. So much for my high pain tolerance. I reached out to Billie last week. Frustrated and in pain, she is all I wanted. I cannot explain why. The comfort, I guess. Right now, she is less tangible to me than Rose or the Gymnast. But the relationships I have with Rose and the Gymnast are superficial, based on sex and money.
The stomach issues have set me back. I felt like I was making progress. Expanding my mind and getting over the past. Now I am not so sure. I have hated the holidays ever since the divorce. I find myself alone, emotional, and in pain this year. Just another crappy ending to a crappy year.
Your doctors sound about as helpful and effective as mine, which is, not at all. I have a lot of stomach issues too and am currently taking acid blockers twice a day (not helping, though). I wouldn't say that needing comfort when you were in a pain is a setback or that you aren't making progress. Progress isn't like being shot out of a cannon, all one direction, and super fast. It's a trend, a movement toward something else. This time of year doesn't help either, holiday pressure and expectations.
ReplyDeleteI went back to my family physician. He still thinks it is my gallbladder and has me scheduled for another test on the 27th. So it will be a painful holiday season.
DeleteI feel you, my friend, I was bedridden for 3 days cos of holiday stress. this time of year is the worst, there are always 10 big events squeezed into one week. and everyone has their end-of-year thing. I wish I could hibernate the entire month like a bear. hoping you feel better soon and here's to a brighter 2020...
ReplyDeleteI really don't think it is stress. although being in pain is stressful. I actually thought I was doing pretty good before these issues came on. Sometimes I feel like I am attracting the wrong things into my life.
DeleteDo you think the pain is psychosomatic? Like the end of the year does seem to creep up on everyone, and if that's how your pain came about... Maybe? I doubt it tho, I feel you on chronic pain. I'm always hurting in some place.
ReplyDeleteI don't think so. I think it is my gallbladder and eventually they will come to the same conclusion. In the mean time I have another test on the 27th. So it will be a joyless Xmas for me.
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